Who’s with me? Truth is, I know am not alone in this, I have always dreamt of becoming an air hostess. Every girl has dreamt of being an air hostess at some point in their life. Grooming up, wearing a wool felt pillbox beret and a nicely steamed suit with red-bottomed pumps not forgetting a beautiful smile which can probably make you get away with murder. Owning a plane’s aisle as your own hallway carrying a tray with a glass of Veuve Clicquot swaying it above people’s heads taking it to this fine-looking gentleman sitting comfortably with his left leg on top of the right one, He has a gold watch and a huge shiny ring, he is also wearing Dolce & Gabbana sneakers reading the new edition of the Forbes magazine, yeah you are right, he is definitely flying business class.
Let’s be honest, who wouldn’t want to call a Boeing their office? Who wouldn’t want to take photos of deicing a plane wing with the hashtag #officeshenanigans? duh! It has to be your dream career, you won’t have to sit your ass the whole day with a laptop responding to emails, or explaining to a 75 yrs. old lady how to use a waist trainer on phone,… it comes with a lot. You have to be familiar with various ways of handling emergencies, any kind, whether it’s dealing with an old folk who has an oxygen tube on, a guy choking on his saliva or even a preggers mama and her contractions are making her roll from one end to the other. You must have general first aid knowledge, to deal with any kind of situation. Anything might happen when you are in 30,000 ft. Above Sea Level. I heard most people experience panic attacks during takeoff, especially if they are flying for the first time. So they might puke or whatever. You got to do what you got to do I mean; you are the air hostess on duty.
You also need to know karate or some taekwondo kicks since there might be a prisoner, a deportee, a thief or even a guy with an ill motive on board and they decide to raid on the passengers, so your defense mechanism should be on point. It might seem like a stroll in the park but it takes some balls to become an air hostess. You need to be able to defend this guy whose mama has seen some” I love you” message on his phone from someone saved as ‘mtu wa makaa’ and instead of appreciating the fact that mtu wa makaa actually loves the guy she is all crazy strangling this poor guy, “kwani mtu wa makaa hawezi sema tu ananipenda”? The guy asks ….I mean!!! We are all God’s children we should love each other, right? So you have to save this guy from the hands of this woman.
They prefer tall and good looking people, also your height should be proportional to your weight, and have a well-proportioned body, so some of my central Kenya folks do not stand a chance if you know you know. Most airlines prefer single people since you are required to travel quite a lot as you will spend 90% of your life on a plane, you can take breakfast in Spain and dinner in Johannesburg, how amazing is that? Well its part of the job, it can be challenging for the married guys, unless your spouse has no problem with you leaving them at home with 4 kids to take care of for about a week or so.
Though priorities tend to change with time, as you grow up you realize your ambitions are changing, you moved from wanting to be a doctor to wanting to be a web designer. Technology also has played a big role in this, since no one wants to be a secretary anymore, most folks nowadays want to be DJ’s and Graphic Designers and everything else they want to be, but not in a native African home with civil servant parents. They will break your neck,yaani they paid all that money only for you to become a DJ, hell no!! I would also disagree if my son came to me and said he wants to be a DJ;alafu they assume all Djs have dreadlocks, and dreadlocks are one thing that is highly prohibited in a traditional African home. On the other hand, it’s good to let your kid be whoever he/she chooses to be, let them explore their talents and hobbies.
I am still chasing my dream of becoming an air hostess to date, though I am currently in a completely different field right now, so if you are dreaming of doing something or you are passionate about something, I will tell you now, DO IT!!!! Focus on it and work towards achieving it, it doesn’t matter how long it will take you, JUST DO IT!!! I know folks with prestigious degrees, even P.H.D holders who chose to follow their passion and they are doing so great, mark you it might be something completely unrelated to their area of expertise but they are kicking ass. Like a folk with a degree in electrical engineering currently managing some hospitality firm, it’s crazy but who cares,; It’s the way of life, after all, be an air hostess, a content creator or a juice vendor as long as you put food on the damn table and secure the bag.
REMEMBER TO LOOK UP TO THE STARS AND NOT DOWN AT YOUR FEET.ALSO, DON’T FORGET TO BREAK THE DAMN CEILING WHILE AT IT.!!!!